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Martha:  Charles, I need some advice.

C:  Sure, what about?

M: Yesterday I told my history professor he was an idiot.

C: You’re kidding! In private, or in front of the class?

M: In front of the whole class.

C: I assume you’re not majoring in diplomacy or international relations?

M: It’s not a joke! What should I do?

C: Is he an idiot? No, never mind. Did he kick you out of the class?

M: Not yet. 

C: Why did you call him an idiot? What did he say?

M: He said the only languages worth studying are dead languages.

C: Dead languages? Like Sanskrit and Latin?

M: Yes. He said living languages are boring and decadent.

C: What? That’s nonsense. If he believes that, he is an idiot.

M: Exactly But what should I do?

C: Apologize and give him a box of chocolates. And next time, keep your mouth shut!

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